Wednesday, August 12, 2009
How much wasted time?
Sometimes I can't sleep thinking about all the time and days I've wasted. Being lazy, being drunk, being foolish and in love with some random person again... somedays I wake up from a falling dream and I think that I will never match the level of potential everyone else has for me. Including myself. But I've had a lot of fun. I've done a lot of traveling. Should it matter that I'm not some big published author. I've finished a book. I mean, I read it alot. I like it. I'm successful in small ways and big in my head. I feel like I can put everything off indefinitely because me and God got something going on. We have a secret. And that secret is that I can fuck around and screw up and ignore the calling because I have all the time in the World. I don't know if anyone else knew that. But I'm invincible. That's what Gods been keeping to himself. I wake up and I know that unless I really force it Wednesday is going to be just like Tuesday was and Tuesday was synonymous with Monday and was that Monday or Sunday that was Saturday? I'm tired of wasting time, and moments and minutes on any of this. I'm going to use my life to live and not just float...But where do I start?